//INBOX

[instabilitatem]

I am Connor. The android sent my Cybrerlife.

[text] [voice] [action]

Comments

:<

[instabilitatem]

I have confidence I will do the right thing. [Connor replies with a furrowed brow. His mismatched fingers create a path as he pets Sumo. He looks up at Hank with no such certainty or confidence in his gaze.

What if he follows his programming to its end? What if he can't escape it in time? What if he hurts Hank in the process?

Connor isn't sure if there is any way he could ever forgive himself, even if forgiveness is a very human, a very deviant need.]

I’m sorry I didn’t see the email for this :c

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Connor.

[It feels weird looking down at him like this. Hank doesn’t like it — not when they’re talking about this.]

It’s… [Going to be okay, he wants to say.

But they have no way of knowing if that’ll be the case. And Hank has no idea how to get across everything he’s thinking. Everything he’s feeling. Which is the fact that he is expendable. As long as everyone else is okay, Hank is expendable.

Connor said he probably couldn’t deviate back on Solmara without him. And part of Hank wants to selfishly cling to that, but another part knows that Connor is stronger than that. He’ll find his way. Just like he would back at home once Hank was gone.]

You’re more capable than you think, y’know. Don’t let anyone let you think otherwise.

all good!

[instabilitatem]

[Connor turns his gaze back to Sumo, focusing on how soothing the petting motion is. It allows him to try and find the proper words. He has a database full of a hundred thousand words and yet none of them seem to help.]

Hank, I don't want to do this without you.

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

[Jesus, tugging right on those heartstrings.]

I know that, Connor. And I don’t want… that. Don’t want you to have to do that. But you’re stronger than me. Even if I’m not here — especially if I’m not here. Or there, or whatever. You’re gonna do so much good, Connor. You’re gonna be great. You’re gonna help everyone on Etraya and Solmara. Because that’s the right thing to do, and because you can.

[instabilitatem]

I can only help one of the two, Hank. Solmara or Etraya. I know which I’ve been programmed to help.

[Connor shakes his head. There are so many conflicts in his programming, but he hasn’t hit tbe threshold of deviancy.

But he knows it must be soon.]

Come back with me to Solmara.

OOF my heart 😭 OOF

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

We can help both, Connor.

[Which is Hank’s way of saying that he’s not leaving Etraya.]

Can you... trigger going back? Or is there a meet-up place? Time?

[How is Connor going to get everyone from Etraya to Solmara...?

If. If.]

[instabilitatem]

[Hank’s insistence that they can help both just adds another crack in Connor’s programming. He stares down at Sumo with furrowed brows.]

I’m not permitted to tell you that.

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

That’s all right. I get it. [But he still sighs.] I trust you to know what to do. Not that you’re leaving, I just...

[Another deep sigh, this time loud enough to make Sumo raise his head. Disturbed by his noisy human, perhaps, or seeking more pets.]

Don’t wanna fuck this up and not have contingency plans in place, you know?

[A pause, then:] They’d be safe, right? If you took everyone to Solmara. I mean, you’d have Aurora’s whatever thing.

[instabilitatem]

I’m not sure. She doesn’t—

[As sad of a place as Solmara is, the programming steps in again.]

It’s possible.

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

It’s possible what? Possible they’d be safe? Possible your Aurora-whoever equivalent would hurt them?

[Hank scowls: not because of Connor, just the situation.]

[instabilitatem]

I’m not permitted to tell you.


[The same old song being sung once more. Connor gets up from his place near the floor to return to the window.]

cn: mention of Cole ;;

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Connor. [Hank doesn’t know how to remain stoic for this, so he doesn’t even try. Hands clasped in his lap.] There are kids here. Kids barely older than Cole.

And I’m sure Solmara has kids too, but that just means we have to save both.

[instabilitatem]

[Connor looks at Hank in the reflection before shaking his head.]

I can’t tell you, Hank.

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Yeah, yeah. Can’t tell me this, can’t tell me that. Wasn’t a question anyway, Connor.

[There’s another long, long stretch of Etraya devoid of remarkable landmarks. And it’s not remarkable, per se, but the trolley stops outside the diner and Hank stiffens. Looking down at Sumo till they pass.]

[instabilitatem]

[Connor has the distinct feeling that Hank is growing more irritated with him. Perhaps they do need to spend some time apart, if just to keep Hank from strangling Connor. When the trolley stops at the diner, the instinct to get out rises. However, just as quickly as they've stopped, they've begun moving again.]

You're angry with me.

the strangling noooo 😭 Hank use your words pls

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Not angry with you, Connor. How would you feel if our roles were reversed and I couldn't tell you anything? If I were set on this mission to get a bunch of people killed? If you felt powerless to help me? How would that make you feel, Connor? Because I imagine you’d feel pretty goddamn shitty.

[instabilitatem]

[Connor is quiet for a long moment before he redirects his gaze back out to the sights the trolley passes. And then something hits Connor.]

Kamski's test. That's the closest I've come to deviating. [But they don't have any--

Max has a gun. Max came with a gun. But who would be so close that Connor would find issue with shooting? Robert? Hank?]

cn: spider mention

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Yeah? [Sometimes Hank forgets there’s so much that this Connor didn’t get to experience. He hopes he’s made up for it in part, despite knowing he never really could.]

Do you...? I mean, I don’t have my gun. [Which would have been real nice during that whole spider debacle.]

[instabilitatem]

[Max has a gun. Connor would have nearly all the pieces he needs. He only requires repairs and then he can take what they need from Aurora.]

Do you know of anyone with a gun?

[He's not technically lying, not yet.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

No, but I’m sure I could find one. [Accelerator might know. Which is extremely fucked up, but... desperate times, desperate measures. Aurora? Would Aurora give him a gun?]

I could find you a gun, Connor.

[And all the implications that sentence holds: asking Connor to wield it. To shoot, if necessary.]

[instabilitatem]

[The programming is all clicking together. If he can have Hank on this task, thinking it will help, then Connor would have room to do what he needs to bring down Etraya.

As long as Hank doesn't somehow acquire a weapon before Connor can get to that point.]

You could?

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Somebody’s gotta have one. [Hank shrugs.] Or know where to get one. There’s a whole ass shooting range, so — sure it’s not difficult.

[Of course the trolley’s already passed the shooting range...!]

[instabilitatem]

[Connor turns in his seat again, facing Hank.]

We may be able to force the deviancy that way.

[And maybe it will give Hank some hope to hold onto until Connor completes his mission.]

[bootyshortsforoldmen]

Yeah. Yeah, all right.

[This gives Hank his own little mission. Something to wrap his head around. Something to do.]

Then you’re gonna... [Is he going to say it? Does he need to?] Jesus.

[Hank doesn’t envy Connor here.]

Can you do it, do you think? I mean — fuck, Connor.

[instabilitatem]

[Connor pauses before nodding slowly.] I think so.

[Still not a lie, but Connor is stretching the limits of his ability to lie by omission.]